How many times have you regretted what you said? How many times have you regretted what you did? I mean, we're humans—it happens. But there is a very special trick that I wanna share with you today, and it really is amazing. It's called "the magic pause."
Imagine in life if you had this giant "pause" button. So that when the emotions were getting heated and the words were flying around, and you wanted to have this, like, huge reaction, this giant "pause" button appeared in front of you, and you could just be like...so you could stop and think, really think about what you wanted to say or do. Because in that pause, there are choices. There's space to, sort of, get clear to take a breath, to get out of the frenzy of emotion that's going on, so that you can get deeper and see maybe some consequences of your actions.
Now, this is not easy to implement right away. You have to practice it. But I'll tell you when you do practice it, it's amazing this...the breadth of information that comes to you, the choices that suddenly appear, and the less energy you will waste repairing the damage of what you said or what you did.
So here's how you begin. One, you need to really get honest with yourself. Are you somebody who, sort of, starts speaking without really thinking? Are you someone who in the past has to really go back and kind of clean up, kind of, the mess that you said or did? All of that takes a lot of energy. And if you are someone who does that, then acknowledge that you do have a growth period where you need to practice this new technique of the magic pause. Bring your awareness to it. And in the beginning it will feel a little bit awkward. But next, try it out!
So when you feel that sensation of energy, things are getting a little bit heated, you've got...you're kind of on—breathe. Breathe...even while it's coming at you, breathe and calm yourself down. And even though your impulse is going to be to react—stop yourself. This is where you're gonna really need to use the brakes. In the beginning, it is effort! But by giving yourself a little bit of effort and the option to just say, "You know what? I need to get back to you." "Hmm, let me think about that for a minute." "I have to take care of something. I'll be right back." Those options, giving yourself some excuse to pause it, gives you the opportunity to tap into some other information that is literally blocked if the emotions are too high.
So try the magic pause. See for yourself how it shifts things around, how it gets you out of this circle of habitual emotional intensity, so that you can be calm and cool and collected. You'll have a lot more energy for more interesting solutions—trust me. Try it! See for yourself.